I have a theory that all-around confident, secure people do less talking and more listening. I've had several conversations with people who just could not stop talking about themselves, and I felt were trying to prove something to me the entire time. Geeze, isn't that exhausting? It's like even when the conversation is about you, it's not—they find a way to revert everything back to themselves. People like that suck.
If you're the best blogger out there, then that's great honey, but a.) No, you're not. b.) Shut the hell up and let your work do the talking. I have the same sentiments towards people who talk about how smart they are, and analyze to death how smart or stupid they think others are. Being smart isn't getting you laid (well, unless you're Steve Wozniak maybe), so again, shut the hell up.
The thing I despise the most is people who broadcast how happy they are in their relationship. Of course, telling a friend or family member that you have a wonderful boyfriend or girlfriend is totally normal, but that's not what I'm talking about. Does anyone watch The Housewives of Orange County? That new chick (I'm blanking on her name) is allllways telling anyone who will listen that her husband is her soulmate/love of her life/best thing that's ever happened to her, etc etc. Ok, so I do believe in soulmates, and I've met mine, but I have never ever once acted like this. In the almost four years I've been with my boyfriend, I haven't even put up a profile pic on Facebook with him in it! (I'm not hating on people who do, but you get my point). These kinds of people are so transparent. It's obvious that they're trying to convince others, and themselves, of how great their lives are. Don't get me wrong though, I'm sure I ramble on and on about myself sometimes, too. (Friends, stop nodding your heads in agreement!)
Do you guys know the kind of person I'm talking about, or am I just going off on a tangent here? Any stories to share on this one?
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Um...yes. I know these people. I do not like these people.
ReplyDeleteI have been guilty of not asking questions of others. Eg - if someone asks me how I am doing or what my weekend plans are I respond but don't ask, "what about you?" This is a habit I need to get out of so as to not become one of "these" people of which you speak.
Oh, and truly intelligent people never speak about their intelligence. Bright people ask questions, admit that they don't know or don't understand something, and seek to learn more from interacting with new people. My mother didn't get her degree until I was 8 years old (she was in her 40s), and man that woman asks TONS of questions of people.
Spouting off the fact that you were Summa Cum Laude at your school doesn't do much these days if you don't have the skills to back it up. It is okay on your resume, but not okay as a part of your small talk.
Yes! I have a friend that turns every conversation around to her and it's possibly the most annoying thing ever...Even stupid things like if it took me 2hrs to get to work because of the snow, it took her 2 1/2 and the roads were way worse by her, of course. Your theory about confident people being the complete opposite is exactly right.
ReplyDeleteAnd I find she always exaggerates about everything...If someone gives her the simplest compliment all of a sudden she thinks she's the envy of everyone around. And it's bad when they tell the same story in front of you and it's different every time...I would love to find out if (1) it's even true at all or (2) which version is actually legit!
I'm probably the one who has gone off on a tangent now :)
Danielle, your friend sounds like the SNL character who tries to one-up everyone..Penelope.
ReplyDeleteSee the link:
http://www.hulu.com/watch/107509/saturday-night-live-penelope
Don't worry, Shannon, the fact that you are even aware that you sometimes may not ask other people questions, etc. shows that you are NOT one of these people. I'll have to check out that SNL skit...EVERYONE knows a "one-upper." (ok, I know that's not a word)
ReplyDeleteYes, Danielle, that is the worst. What I can't stand even more are people who try to top you based on depressing shit. Like, if I happened to mention my dad passed away, and then someone else is like, Well mine did too AND MY DOG! or something. Ok, that was random, but I totally know people who are like this...it's like they are in a competition with how hard their life is or something.
I definitely agree that they are trying to convince someone... especially themselves. When I read or hear people going on about themselves or their relationship or whatever like that, I just think to myself... yeah, OKAYYY. Nobody is perfect, no relationship is perfect, so either these people are lying or they are in for a rude awakening!
ReplyDeleteI couldn't have said it better myself, MM!
ReplyDeleteHi Ellen,
ReplyDeleteI just discovered your blog - I think it's great!
Keep up the awesome work, it's so entertaining!
Jecca
Well hey there, Jecca! Thank you so much for the encouraging words—you made my day!!
ReplyDeleteFantastic! Love it!
ReplyDeleteJecca, just checked out your blog too, SO FUN! I tried commenting, but it didn't show up. Do you have to approve it first??
ReplyDelete