Monday, November 16, 2009

Do you wish you had more friends?

I have tons of wonderful friends, but sometimes I find myself wishing I had more. I know, I know, I always want more. More clothes, more money, more friends—I'm a greedy bitch. New York is so crazy and everyone is busy, and lives in a different 'hood, so it's not always easy to get together. So, if I had more friends, I wouldn't have to worry about going to events by myself, which is just what I might have to do on Wednesday night. 

Just as I was thinking this, I came across something on Twitter that made me laugh and rethink everything I just said. Here it is:

"I don't need more friends. You got friends and all they do is ask you to help them move. Fuck that. I'm old. I'm through moving shit."

This is a tweet from Shitmydadsays. He's a 29 year-old dude who lives with his 73 year-old dad and documents every hilarious word out of his mouth.  My friend and FnF reader, Michael, introduced me to him and I'm so glad. Isn't this quote genius? My dad had the same best friend, Bobby Clark, for 60 years. He seemed so content to just hang with Bobby or be with family, and I always thought that was pretty cool. I think if we're going to take anything from this, it should be that the older you get, it's the quality, not quantity of friends you have that's important. Plus, who really wants to help anyone "move shit"? 

What about you guys: Do you sometimes wish you had more friends?


15 comments:

  1. Ellen! I thought I was your date on Wednesday! Or are you already sick of me..... :]

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  2. Jen! You TOTALLY are!! You had mentioned having other events that night too, so I was already preparing myself for you to bail. Not in a bad way, but ya know what I'm sayin'. I'd still LOVE for you to come!!

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  3. I am astounded by your lack of trust in me :]

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  4. You don't necessary need more friends... just strategically chosen friends! Ok, yeah, that doesn't sound so good. I guess the distinction should be made between friends and acquaintances: friends are there for life, but acquaintances can serve to fill day-to-day voids. For example, I have a few really close friends, but I know I can never convince them to join me for a tough session at the gym. Solution? Find someone who shares that same interest. You may not become lifelong "friends", but you can rely on each other for sharing a bond at the gym!

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  5. As the only child of an only child I often find myself going solo to things, and boggled by the idea that you need a plus one to do stuff - like go the to ladies room. Eg - I just ate dinner by myself in my hotel in Savannah and was delighted by the evening (yes, It is 7pm and I am finished with dinner...you got a problem with that?!)
    I am blessed with lots of friends and find there is not enough to adequately nurture all of those relationships. But I would never turn down the thought of developing new, real friendships along with those...I just don't seek them out.

    SCS

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  6. Good point, SOH, I guess I need more acquaintances then!

    And SCS, I like doing things by myself, too. I go to the movies alone, even on a Saturday night quite often. I've gone to events alone too, and I don't know why, but they are just more fun if you have someone with you to share the experience with. (Read: It's nice to have someone there in case you run into a B.O.B.--Better offer bitch).

    And Jenn, it's all set for tomorrow then--I'll email you the deets!

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  7. Hahaha I knew you would love ShitMyDadSays! That guy is hilarious!! He got a book deal and a tv sitcom development deal out of it.

    I like having a core group of really close friends that I would step in front of traffic for, and then having more random friends to go to happy hour with that maybe I wouldn't step in front of traffic for but I would administer CPR to until the ambulance got there if they got hit by a car.

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  8. i also love quality over quantity!! although i think in a city like new york, it is good to have many "plus ones"-as you pointed out, everyone lives all over and is so busy, it's nice to have a wide range of people to be able to call on to be a gym buddy or an art show buddy, or a shopping buddy. i don't mind doing things alone, but a party is NOT one of those things. i am with you ellen-if i go to a party alone, who am i going to make crazy eyes at when a BOB enters the room?!?!

    and um this guy is hysterical. can we be his "plus one" to something!?

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  9. Well, Michael, I'll be sure not to walk into oncoming traffic when you're around! haha Daaamn, a book deal AND a sitcom--that's pretty sweet. Where does this dude live? We need to hook him up with Mary Allen!!!

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  10. I think I'm pretty happy with the number of friends I have. My problem is there are too many 'groups' of people. My volleyball group of 15 always does stuff together (home game nights, clubbing, dinners etc.), similarly with my hiking group, then I have a smaller group to go to plays and concerts and finally some friends to go running with. The problem arises when I want to attend some event with a plus one. I can't favor anyone because you know how girls can get offended and I can't ask any of the guys 'coz I'm single and it would raise eyebrows. Sigh.

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  11. Juggling friends/groups is hard, Footloose. I constantly did that in high school, and it totally stressed me out. Maybe you should just be up front with your friends. If you have an event and you're worried about hurting someone's feelings, just say, "I asked (insert name of friend here) to this event because she loves music, but you're next on my list!" Ok, cheesy, but you get my point! Honesty is always appreciated :)

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  12. You're damn right it's stressful! I'm pretty sure the friends don't mind all that much despite their ribbing.
    And I do realize it sounds like a high-school problem and I'm 26! :(

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  13. Hey, you've got a lot of friends--that's not such a bad problem to have! :)

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