Wednesday, November 4, 2009

Wanna knock boots?

No, not with me--with him. I saw a Craigslist posting yesterday from an 18 year-old virgin on one of my new favorite websites, The Luxury Spot. He's looking for that one special lady to "lose it" with. And by special, I mean anyone with lady parts who is ready and willing for a hot, sexy, 60-second rendezvous.

He lives in Brooklyn. I find it hard to believe that he can't find one skank to do the nasty with. Especially because fifth graders are giving out BJs in the back of school buses like it's a handshake. But, I feel for the dude. Being an 18 year-old virgin these days is the new 40 year-old virgin for guys: SOCIAL SUICIDE. It would be the equivalent of a character on Gossip Girl wearing last year's Prada. Unthinkable. However, I don't know if it was smart of him to broadcast his business on the web. The harassment he is undoubtedly getting from his friends can't be worth it. Good luck, guy!

Just thought I'd lighten up the mood a little. What's the funniest ad on Craigslist you've ever seen?

4 comments:

  1. this is hilarious and so embarrassing!

    i once was forwarded a posting from craig's list's "missed connections" that something like "i held the door open for you at the gas station. you were a big girl wearing a yellow shirt and you farted when you walked past me. we laughed and talked about double cheeseburgers. please contact me, you were hot."

    not exactly it, but still very close....

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  2. I used to read the "Missed Connections" and fantasize (did I spell that right) that someone missed a chance to speak to me one morning while I walked out of Starbucks at 7 in the morning with a cup of tea and my lunch for the day- ha,ha...no chance. So I guess that would be the funniest thing. As for this dude: sad,sad,sad. Just be a virgin and be happy that you are not having to go get checked out every 6 months, and spend a week freaked out not sure whether the doctor said they will call if the results are negative or won't call you if the results are negative.
    P.S. Never post your face on craigslist for silly business like this again, you dufus!!! you definitely ain't gettin' any now! LOL,LOL,LOL...h-i-l-a-r-i-o-u-s!

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  3. Ellen? Are you turning pimp?

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  4. LOL, MA!! So funny and TRUE Audrey. Nothing is worse than stressing about getting "news" from the doc. I mean, not that I would really know or anything...

    And no, Joe I haven't turned to pimping for a living. Although, you never know how desperate I just might get!

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