Friday, March 5, 2010

Things I don't suck at

When I did this post about the things I suck at, a few people wanted to then know what I rocked at. This, my friends, is a harder list to make. I'm good at plenty of things, but I don't totally kick ass at anything. I'm not a sudoku master, or a Scrabble whiz—I can't even make a mean omelette or remember all the words to my favorite rap songs. I just called my boyfriend to brainstorm with me, and he was no help. (Being a caring person and a good listener doesn't count, hun!) Right. Looks like I'm tackling this one alone. So, here we have it. Things I don't suck at:

1. Dr. Mario. I spent the better part of my childhood trying to find something I could beat my brother at, and finally, one day it happened. I defeated him in a game of Dr. Mario. Out of the thousands of games we played after that, I probably only won like three more times, but that's besides the point. I did actually kick a little ass in that game, and I frequently beat his friends, too. For some reason I was a master at quickly lining up those pills in just the right order. Now, as for every other Nintendo game, that's a different story. Trying to save the princess from the fire-spewing dragon? Forget about it.

2. Jager bombs. Ain't no thang, y'all. Tip it back, down the hatch, BOOM. Gimme another. (Flinching is not involved.)

3. Pop-A-Shot. Ya know that basketball game you see in arcades? I can beat you at it. Yes, I can. (After all, I am from Kentucky. John Wall, WHAT!?) A few months ago I schooled a group of dudes in a Pop-A-Shot competition at a loft party. That is, until I got fall-on-my-face wasted.  
4. Side planks. Remember this post when I told you about how competitive I can be in yoga class and showed you my best move? Yes, the side plank. Since that post, I have perfected the pose—my hips are higher, my leg is straight, wobbling is at a minimum. There are lots of yogis far more superior than I am, but I have yet to see one who can do a better side plank.

5. The worm. Everyone thinks they can do the worm until they try and realize...they can't. I discovered this talent in high school. I catch mad air, yo. My skillz are sick. I can't do it drunk though—I learned that the hard way.

So, what do you think about my list? What special talents do you have? Go on, start bragging!


  1. LOVE IT! This is an awesome list, and lots of the things on it involve "Badassitude".

    So well-done.
    Me: I am awesome at small talk/cocktail party conversations. I can seem engaging and charming to someone that I actually think is a raging a-hole. This serves me very well as both an attorney and as someone who is a bit more liberal-leaning than 80% of her state. (note: that is not to say that I think people more conservative than me are raging a-holes. Most raging a-holes I talk to are attorneys). The secret: asking open-ended questions with follow-ups that actually don't show your own personal opinions, rather just show knowledge or feigned interest.

    I am also good at booty-shakin. I always impress the sassy ladies in a hip hop class or on a dance floor because I look like an uptight librarian with no fanny. But I shake what I got.


  2. Badassitude, love it, SCS. I'm actually also really good at engaging people at parties, and I've been known to shake it on the dance floor too :) Altho, I'm not so good at being charming to someone I think is a raging A-hole...I wear my feelings on my sleeve too much to be able to do that :/

  3. I really want to see you do the worm now!!

  4. AWESOME POST! Love it! I will say that I definitely kick ass at crossword puzzles! :)

  5. Oh and I think a You Tube video of you doing the wormis definitely in order!!!

  6. ummm i think its time for a worm video blog post

  7. The worm = awesome. When I read your comment on Smitten about it I LOL'd. I've only met about 2 people in my whole life that are decent wormers. ;)And agree w/previous comments, a worm video post is def in order.

  8. The worm? Done it. Pop a shot? Love. Jager bombs? YIKES.

    LOL. Love your sassy wit.

  9. i love this - absolutely fantastic. i don't think i've ever seen the worm done successfully in person, so kudos to you.

    hmm. i don't suck at sipping wine like it's water. also, i'm getting pretty awesome at crow.

  10. WHAT?! Worm video? What did I get myself into! Ok...I'll think about it :)

    Hey JennyMac, let me know if you ever want to have a Pop-A-Shot throwdown, ha. And Leslie, PLEASE tell me your secrets to crow...After doing yoga for two years, I STILL can't do it!

  11. Love it...and another request for the worm video! You have to!! Oh, and Dr. Mario ROCKS. Best game.

    My talents are parallel parking, baking sugar cookies (I'm okay at other cookies, but my sugar cookies are out of control), math, and memorizing lyrics (every song ever...even songs I hate).

  12. Ok...THIS IS HILARIOUS! I was having a bad day and this definitely got a giggle out of me :-)

  13. I did the worm at my wedding, I'm not sure what it looked like, but it was the DJ's idea and I went with it cuz I was pretty loose (read drunk). Things I don't suck at: Putting little G to sleep, Home renovation, designing things, building things, fixing things, and I can do very large cartwheels.