Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Jury Duty: My Cousin Vinny style

I wish! Jury duty wasn't nearly as exciting as My Cousin Vinny (favorite movie of ALL time!), but I came across a few interesting characters yesterday. It was quite the comical experience. So of course EVERYONE is trying anything and everything to get out of it. All the jewish people claimed they couldn't serve because of a holiday next week. And even though a lot of them probably haven't been to temple in years, it was reasonable. You can't question someone about religion. But what about the lady who exclaimed she just couldn't do it because she had a HAIR APPOINTMENT on Monday. Everyone chuckled and she said, "Whaaat?" She was dead serious, people. Dead.serious. Her hair was purple, so actually, I'd say not only was it a valid excuse, but an emergency!

And then there were people who took this as an opportunity to get their 15 minutes of fame. One lady strolled into the courtroom in a metallic gold trench and oversized shades. She sat waaay leaned back in her chair and talked in a low, raspy voice. She was clearly pleased with her image. But the judge actually called her out and asked if she was talking in her REAL voice! Haha. She coughed and then poof, suddenly her voice went up five octaves. Another dude was REALLY excited to rattle off his rap sheet: Two DUIs, busted for smoking pot on the street, arrested for possession of a martial arts weapon (yes), and the list goes on. I don't know about you, but I sure was impressed.

And then there was lil ol' me feeling so boring and normal, giving my spiel about how I lost my job and don't collect unemployment, so if I'm not available to work, then I'm not able to pay rent, and more importantly EAT! I actually wouldn't mind serving on jury duty at some point. It seemed pretty interesting, but I already had to turn down one freelance gig for the time I was there, AND I wasn't able to go to my part-time job. Not cool. So they let me go. I think my "excuse" was better than most.

Obviously there weren't any lawyers in the courtroom as badass as Joe Pesci. It is just hilarious when he wears this suit! I love when he gives this explanation to the judge:

I bought a suit. You seen it. Now it's covered in mud. This town doesn't have a one-hour cleaner, so I had to buy a new suit, except the only store you could buy a new suit in has got the flu. Got that? The whole store got the flu, so I had to get this in a second hand store.

And who could forget Marisa Tomei's style? Awe.some. There just aren't words for how amazing she was in this movie.

So tell me: Has anyone else witnessed funny characters at jury duty? And are there any other My Cousin Vinny fans out there? C'mon, hit me with your favorite quote!


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  2. I LOVE everything and everyone in that movie!

    Ok I have an unrelated question and am going to ask it here because I have no patience to look for the relevant blog post. I know you don't bare your arms in clothes because you think they're fat or something? I have the same problem with my legs and I've never worn shorts for that reason. My girlfriends recently convinced me to buy a pair assuring me that nobody cares if my legs aren't skinny and that I was tall (5'8) so it was perfectly fine. Tell me, would you recommend me going out in shorts or would it be a faux pas? I ask you because I think exactly like you in many ways and I'm not sure whether to listen to my well-meaning friends for once.

    p.s. I don't have flabby legs - I just think they're thick.

  3. ellen..Can you actually talk about being on jury duty..?? I always thought it was kinda a kudos word?

  4. Hey Kelly. Well, you definitely can't talk about the actual case. I'm pretty sure describing a few funny people I saw while I was there is OK.

    Footloose, I definitely think you should rock the shorts. I think we're always the most critical of ourselves and really zero into our "trouble" areas, where as other people don't really notice, ya know? Like, a lot of my friends complain about their arms or butt and I don't even see what they're talking about. But with ME because (unfortunately) I am so critical and hard on myself, I notice things other people wouldn't. I have short, but very muscular legs too. I think the key is in the fit. Not too tight, or too short, but not too long either. I think a mid-thigh cuffed short looks good on most people. Or denim shorts with a loose frayed hem that rest at the hips.

  5. Thanks Ellen - it's strange but I feel more reassured with an unbiased stranger's opinion than my friends' :)

    BTW, my favorite part in the movie has to be Marisa Tomei stomping her foot and yelling about her body block ticking away :D

  6. So i haven't actually had JD...trying not to say it, cuz i don't want to jinx myself, you're the second blogger on my list in the last month who got called into this mess. As for my fav movie quote, "the two utes" "utes?" i recently watched this movie for the first time in over 10 years and forgot how awesome it was. its on my must own list!

  7. Apparently we are destined for friendship because My Cousin Vinny is my favorite movie. It's my go to answer when anyone asks.

    For the record, I am Jewish and I have no idea what holiday is next week. Granted I'm not a very good or religious Jew, but I'm just saying. It's not one of the biggies.

    Rachel @ MWF Seeking BFF

    I kind of want jury duty. I think it would be FASCINATING. Plus I'd get out of the cube for a day.

  8. I have never been called for Jury Duty...THANK GOODNESS and KNOCK ON WOOD!

  9. I JUST got a questionaire in the mail which means I'm about to be called. Blah. I've never done it before. They will never choose me but it's still a pain. I actually answered one of the questions wrong. I've lived in Brooklyn for 3 years but who knew it was called Kings County? I'm such an airhead sometimes!

    PS I LOVE my cousin vinny but i always picture Jesse L. Martin from L&O. THAT would be great.

  10. Ha, totally understand. Any time, Footloose :)

    Nadette, that's one of my favorite quotes too! Two YOUTHS! I also love when he's drilling the guy about the grits: ARE YOU SURE ABOUT THAT FIVE MINUTES!!! lol Oh lord, now all I want to do is curl back into bed and watch this movie!

    MWF, yes, it's destiny :) I'm pretty sure most of the those people weren't sure which Jewish holiday it was either. One person mentioned it and everyone else followed suit! And yeah, it was a pretty cool experience. Although, I wouldn't want to do it more than a day or two!

    Don't worry, Elizabeth, I have PLENTY of airhead moments!

  11. I have never been called for jury duty, but I think it could be an interseting experience. My husband is an Assistant District Attorney, so part of his job is picking juries, so I have heard about that side of it!
    I love Marisa Tomei's "imagine you're a deer" monologue. So hilarious!

  12. I don't rememeber the exact line but, I loved when the DA was interviewing a prospective female juror and, when he presented the case to her, she said something like "Fry them" or "Hang them" or something to that effect. To which he replied; "She's acceptable to me".