Are you a girl's-girl (or a guy's-guy)?

So I stopped writing about The Bachelor because no one really seemed into it (guess I didn't give you guys enough credit!), but I'm going to reference it one more time because it relates to a topic I want to address. As most of you probably know, Jake picked Vienna--the most unliked girl in the house. Tenley's bubble gum sweet personality totally grated on my nerves, so I'm OK with his choice, but there's something about a woman who isn't a girl's-girl that I don't particularly trust.

I hate how these types of girls tell themselves that the reason other girls don't like them is because they are jealous--that's what Vienna's family said to Jake when the issue came up. Please. No one is jealous of you or your stankass weave, Vienna. I know a girl whose mom I'm pretty certain reassures her on a daily basis that everyone is envious of her. I guess it never occured to her that she is friendless because she's um...boring. And socially inept.

Some women are just a little awkward around other females, or get along better with men for whatever reason, and that's fine. I'm not lumping everyone into the Vienna category. However, I'm a total girl's-girl. So much in fact, that one of my must-haves for a guy I'm dating has always been that he's a guy's-guy. (It's like right up there with how he treats his mom.) There's just something sexy about it.

A lot of times when I'm out with my boyfriend and his friends, I'll go home early and he'll carry on partying with the boys. Some of my friends don't understand why it doesn't bother me when he does that, but honestly it would be weird to me if he didn't want to. Have you seen the movie I Love You Man? Lord, I'd hate to be one of those brides who had like ten bridesmaids, while my soon-to-be husband had to ask third cousins and guys he hadn't talked to in over a year to be groomsmen. Awk-ward. An.y.way.

Tell me: Are you a girl's-girl, or a guy's-guy? If not, does it bother you?

Bachelor Blog 3: How many times do you go out with someone before you cut them loose?

Who watched The Bachelor on Monday? I just watched it this am on Hulu. So to catch everyone up to speed, Jake was supposed to say adios to just two ladies, but ended up giving the boot to FOUR. Talk about some muy chicas tristes up in that casa! (Who's jealous of my Spanish skillz? I can't say for sure why I'm randomly busting them out?) Who knows. An.y.way...

Jake isn't messing around. Literally. He basically told Kathryn that he wanted to bone, yes bone, her (well, I think he actually said something about "being lost in her eyes" barf), and then he kicks her off the show! Jake was worried that there was nothing beyond physical attraction. Umm, is that such a bad thing? And, she was from KENTUCKY gosh dang'it! And then there was Ella from Tennessee (good call), then the chick with the whacked out green eyeshadow and then Ashleigh. I thought Ash was totally gorge—she has awesome, I mean awesome wavy blonde hair and bangin' curves—what else do you need, dude? And, he gave Vienna a rose! WTF?! Homegirl needs to buy some better extensions with all that money she's got. I digress.

I do understand where Jake is coming from—I've never been one to "waste" my time. I just don't think it's fun spending time with someone (even for a FREE meal) that I'm not really into. With that being said, I was a little unsure about my boyfriend when I first met him. Sure, he was super-cute, charming and had a British accent, but I didn't know right away that I'd end up feeling bananas for him—it took a little time. So that brings me to my question.

How many times do you go out with someone before cutting them loose? Do you think Jake made a smart move? Ohh maybe he kicked someone off that he knows he wants to bring back later so he's the one that has the "most dramatic season yet!" 

Bachelor Blog 2: How do you keep your confidence up in a room full of pretty girls?

I missed my Bachelor post last week, so I'm making up for it now. Christina got the boot, and it was her lack of confidence that hurt her. I don't really blame her, I mean, if I was in a house full of professional models and girls who just looked like models, I'd be intimidated too. But it's also like, c'mon pull it together, girl!

Christina's a pretty girl. I do think she is a bit lacking in the sex appeal arena (some people just don't really have it), but if she had exuded more confidence, she would have come across much sexier. Compared to Rozlyn (slut) and Gina, I'd look like the girl who's gone to fat camp every summer for the last 10 years and failed miserably, but I'd be damned if I'd actually act like the fat girl!

There are too many girls in New York who are a quadruple threat, which I just decided to call the S.S.S.P.: skinny, stylish, successful, pretty. I really haven't been to any other city with so many S.S.S.P. girls just walking the streets everywhere you turn. (From what guy friends tell me, I'd find them by the herds in Madrid, too). It can be hard to deal with sometimes, but I've learned to.

How? Well, you know how you can immediately sense when another girl is intimdiated by you or another girl in the room? (Not that I intimidate anyone, but I think the girls know what I'm talking about here). I'm forever fearful of being that girl because it's just so obvious--I don't want someone else to be able to detect my confidence drop as soon I shake their hand. I also don't want to be the girl who acts bitchy because I'm insecure. (Give it up girls, everyone knows why you're acting that way). So as soon as I meet an S.S.S.P. or anyone else that makes my insecurity levels rise, I just give myself a little pep talk. Really, I do. I say, "Ellen, be friendly, be confident, be engaging--do not let your insecurity show," and it works.

I guess it helps that I genuinely like meeting new people, so even if you are a skinny bitch, I'm not going to hold it against you. Well, not for long ;) I've also learned to be adaptive to different personalities, and to find a common denominator with anyone I'm talking to. There used to be a group of fashion girls I'd always run into and felt so intimidated by until one day I decided to actually get to know them. I've found a couple topics of conversation that I know if all else fails will always be easy and pleasant with them, so that's what I turn to when I need to. See, it's not so hard.

So girls: How do you keep your confidence up in a room full of pretty girls? And guys, how important is confidence to you in a girl?

Bachelor Blog 1: "Nice guys don't finish last, they just have to wait a little longer."

That's just one of the many Velveeta things that came out of Jake's mouth last night, and that's not even the worst of it. I'm not a huge fan of him (yeah I said it), but I like watching The Bachelor to see just how crazy the girls get. There are definitely some wack jobs up in that house—I can't WAIT to see shit go down! Since the show provides so much blog fodder, I've decided to do a regular Bachelor post until it's over. Who's happy about this?

Sure, he's got a dreamy smile and perfectly sculpted guns, but let's be honest ladies, the most alluring quality about Jake is the fact that wants a wifey. I'm not attracted to super-mushy men like Jake because it just doesn't seem genuine or natural to me, but I know I'm probably in the minority here. My boyfriend put it best when he said: "Guys assume one day they'll get married and have kids, but most don't dream about it or anticipate how it's going to happen. It happens when it happens." For the record, I do not think there's anything wrong with a guy wanting a relationship—it's a turn off though when it consumes him and defines who he is. And I haven't used this word in at least 15 years, but he's just.so.corny about it all. Ick. I'm gonna give him a chance though—just maybe he will chillax one good time and win me over!

I know The Bachelor isn't reality (Liza often has to remind me of that when I get heated over an unrealistic movie or TV show), but the Jake-method really does work. In NYC, I've witnessed nice, semi-cute, slightly dorky guys get mad play just because girls assume they are boyfriend material. This attention of course turns them into players and then the vicious cycle starts. Interestingly enough, the opposite is true for women. Guys automatically think that nice girls want a husband, like yesterday, and are scared off.

So tell me: What do you think about Jake? Do you think my theories on nice guys and girls ring true? (I'm sure plenty of guys will disagree with me on this one!)