Before I made the vid, I repeated "I don't give a fuck what a hater's gotta say" to myself over and over in my best Rick Ross voice, but I guess I'm just not gangster like that. I do care. But I got it out and now it's over. Let's move on and be friends. Shall we?
Ohh and can we just discuss that I said the word, um, like. And that my facial expressions could use some serious help? And that I repeated myself on more than one occasion in three minutes? Whatever you were thinking while you watched, I probably was, too. Ohh well!
So yes, the word of the day is POSITIVITY. Without a positive attitude, I would most certainly be curled up in a ditch somewhere. Some of you have written me and said that even when I'm being negative, I'm positive, which I think is pretty cool.
Do you have a positive attitude? When's the last time you had to push negativity out of your life? And which Ellen do you like better—nice or bitchy? Haha!
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Girl, I love your blog because it's YOU and your opinions. Whether I agree with each and every post or not, I hate to think you will filter your opinions through a "what will my commenters say" filter (although all bloggers do to an extent, even if it's subconsciously).
ReplyDeleteAnyway, lovely video, you're very well spoken.
I am constantly trying to shew negativity out of my attitude, and sometimes I do better than other times. The employment thing, as you and many of your readers know first-hand, it weighs on a person for better or for worse.
haliwoodsaywhat.blogspot.com
I just love YOU...you are probably one of the most "real" bloggers I have ever read and I LOVE it! Oh and I liked hearing your voice...it was totally how I imagined it! haha!
ReplyDeletelove this!!! and ellen...you are never nasty or cruel. you might poke fun at people or take jabs, but i haven't ever heard you say something so harsh that it's offensive or hateful. i don't know if it's because i know you or what, but i always picture you saying snarky things with a smile on your face and a giggle!
ReplyDeleteNo man, there ARE annoying bloggers out there. You were 100% right. Don't write to get an agent. Write because you want to / have to / find it fun. Anyone who whores themselves out ain't a true gangsta (read: blogger).
ReplyDeleteMy comments were never said with the intention of hurting you. My point was that the manner in which you outed another blogger was nasty especially considering you self promote too [in a different way admittedly]. You took a personal email they wrote to you and published it in a public space consequently ridiculing them. Even though you didn't publicly name them you did something wholly nasty in my opinion. I'm sure that had they seen your blog post and maybe they have their feels too may have been hurt. They wrote to you with no doubt the bestest of intentions and rather than publicly pondering on the notion of obnoxious bloggers you publicly berated that blogger. I'm sure their feelings were hurt.
ReplyDeleteLike I said several times in my comment I like your blog I enjoy it. If I didn't I wouldn't read it frankly. But there's a fine line between speaking your mind and being nasty. We're all human and even an anonymous comment or blog post can hurt peoples feelings. There's no need to filter your posts. But maybe just think twice before being mean for the sake of it.
I mean in truth that whole discussion got the biggest number of responses probably but it looked like a vast number of them were from friends in real life. And that says a lot. Do you only want people to comment on your blog who only have nice things to say? Maybe my delivery was harsh but you were no nicer in your blog post. I called you conceited just like you inadvertently called that blogger obnoxious. I didn't however call you bitchy, I said 'damn you can be bitchy as fuck' thus only referring to your behaviour rather than your person. You took all the negative things in my comment rather than even looking at the fact I said I liked your blog, was a regular reader and that I thought you were a nice person.
Just me - You're right, people should write = blog for the reasons you stated. But Ellen also wants something substantial to come from her blog. Like a job. Which is cool. And no doubt a large part of the reason she blogs now is to reach that end goal and maybe it does impact on her writing some what but we all get influenced by external sources. It's human nature. You can't always stay pure in your writing.
Anyway since the word of the day is positivity...lets role with that.
Oh and I'm not a hater just to clarify something. :-)
ReplyDeleteWow. Just wow. I think it was time to leave well enough alone here. Seriously, Ellen said she learned something, she spoke to some of your points in a positive way, and in no way shape or form did she ever point explicitly to your comment. I think another novel was totally unnecessary since it was clear that Ellen had addressed the issue with respect, with charisma, and with admitting she had learned from the experience.
ReplyDeleteoh good, another place where joey's i'm "sorry" can be referenced! is everyone laughing yet?
ReplyDeleteAmen Kim!
ReplyDeletejust in case:
ReplyDeletehttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SEw_ZEUuBik&feature=related
and go to 1.20
I give you a lot of credit for putting yourself out there, and I'm sure it's not always easy to hear ALL of the feedback you get. BUT, instead of assuming people are just "hating" when they don't agree with you, you might want to check yourself before you wreck yourself. What I'm saying is it seems like most of the negative comments you get are because readers think you are being a hypocrite. For example, don't rant about other bloggers who are just trying to do the same thing you're trying to do. Don't hate on Mariah's few extra pounds when you're constantly blogging about trying to lose a few yourself. Make sense? If you're going to take a "jab" or make a joke at someone else's expense, at least make sure it's at least kinda funny and not just mean-spirited first, otherwise you're just "hating". A quick demonstration.
ReplyDelete1.) Hating = Eww, did you see that Ellen busted out her haggard-ass faux fur vest YET AGAIN on Photo Shoot Friday?
2.) "Jab" = At first I thought Photo Shoot Friday's theme must have been Night of the Living Roadkill, but then I realized Ellen was just trying to rock her faux fur vest again.
The bottom line is that you shouldn't filter your thoughts based on what you think your readers want to hear, but you've got some strong opinions so if you are going to put them out there be smart about how you present them! Be clear in your writing. Now that everyone jumped all over you about the other blogger you wrote about, you're backpedaling and being all "hey ya'll, I guess it's not what he's doing, it's just how he's going about promoting his blog that I take issue with". So I guess the constructive criticism here is don't be a hypocrite and remember it's not what you say, it's how you say it! We are obviously fans because we read your blog and take the time to comment, so don't take this tough love as negativity.
No worries, Jessica...you know I just look for every possible opportunity to quote a rapper ;)And for the record, I only knew 9 out of the 29 people who commented on that post. And only a couple of those 9 were close friends. And some of the others disagreed with me! I was actually PISSED that more friends didn't jump to back me up! Haha! (Where were you at, guys?!)But yes, I did love the dialogue and I certainly don't expect everyone to be on my side at all times. Sure, it would be awesome if this blog one day helped me to pay some bills or grabbed the attention of an editor, but I'm also very passionate about this blog. I couldn't post twice a day on top of juggling everything else I have going on in my life if I wasn't. Alright, peace, love, happiness. Let's get on with this POSITIVITY thang, y'all!
ReplyDeleteOr not...ha! I hear you, Holly. I said in the video that I would certainly work on these things and try to be more considerate. I'm sure the vid will only come back to bite me in some way, but that's the chance I took. Sometimes you do have to backpedal a bit. When new ideas are brought to the table, it makes you think about things in a different way. Lots of people said, "What's so wrong with promoting? It's what YOU do." So THEN I said, "It was HOW he did it that turned me off." I still stand by the post and yes, even my ugly cheap ass American Eagle fur vest!
ReplyDeleteI'm with you Ellen, positivity is the word of the day! I had a BAD start to my week, but thursday is my birthday, and saturday I'm celebrating so to hell else with everything and everybody that has something negative to say. I didn't read all of the negative chatter from your last post, because I thought it was ridiculous. I also sometimes worry about how i've opened myself up to serious negative response, seeing as how i disucss politics and health reform constantly on my blog. I haven't gotten any hate mail--yet. but I only have 14 followers (i'm up one since my last post-yay me!) and you've had a rough 11 months--being unemployed and all. So BIG UPS to you for being so positive in response to negativity. Browsing the blogosphere has made it clearly obvious that there are a LOT of crazies out there, and a lot of misidirected anger in the world. we must refuse to let it get us down. here's my shameless blog promotion...wait for it...wait for it...
ReplyDeletehttp://eatreadrant-nadette.blogspot.com/
Kim - No actually I think it was my post which upset Ellen the most because she went so far as to quote parts of my comment on her facebook page. And evidently this post is about the impact of that blog post so I'll still make comments because it's still relevant.
ReplyDeleteHolly - Harshly put but you made excellent points.
Ellen - Of course, being unemployed sucks. And you work hard at this old blog thing so why shouldn't you hope that one day it might help you in some way. Maybe a quick email to the other blogger would have been better. Maybe they don't realise how they are being perceived.
slightly off topic, but i lurve your accent! one of my besties just moved back to atlanta and your accent makes me miss her! anywho, i think this was really brave and big of you to post this vid!
ReplyDeleteI'm positive the I want to go home for the day. Does that count?
ReplyDeleteHi Ellen! Sorry to just now be jumping in on the discussion,but I wanted to say that you are doing an amazing job putting yourself out there and being honest in your post. You say things others might not say to the blogosphere worl, and you do it in a way that makes it fun to read. That takes amazing courage.
ReplyDeleteI have a BIG problem with the posters who come on here and attack you personally and then continue to rant on and on about it. Let it go - Ellen is a great person and is putting herself out there. And to attack her and to call her conceited (which is an absolutely ridiculous assumption) is hurtful, whether you mean to be hurtful or not. There is not reason to attack Ellen for her posts. And as my mother always reminds me, "If you can't say anything nice, don't say it at all."
Stay positive Ellen - you are doing an awesome job and I love you!
xoxo
what i'm really upset about is the fact that we have yet another video blog......without the WORM!!
ReplyDeleteThanks, Lalls :)
ReplyDeleteFlip! You aren't going to live that down, are you? Damn. Me and my big mouth. Alright, your voice has been heard and I will take action. I can't promise it's going to be exciting seeing me do the worm though.
The word of the day is positivity, so please please please stop criticizing yourself. The paragraph that warned us about your weird facial expressions and using the word "like" too many times was unnecessary. It was distracting and irrelevant to the post. I enjoy the blog and I think you're really funny but it's obvious that you have self-esteem issues.
ReplyDeleteYou're right, Kim, I am tough on myself. Sometimes it's hard not to pick myself apart when I'm putting it out there for everyone to see. It's just WEIRD more than anything to watch myself. I'm like, "Is that what I really look like? Sound like?" Anyway, yes, positivity will be the word of today too :)
ReplyDeleteEllen, don't feel bad about any comments. As someone who jumped in late and read all the comments at once, I can see that nobody here hates you or thinks badly of you. The people who don't agree with you have a right to voice their opinion, right?
ReplyDeleteOn another note, I'm impressed by how mature and articulate everyone on this blog sounds. Speaks volumes about the quality of the blog. Good job, girl:)
Totally, Footloose. I don't ever expect everyone to agree with me and I absolutely LOVED the dialogue Sunday's post created. I did think a few choice words hit below the belt, and that's why I was hurt. But I'm learning how to deal/react with these things as they come my way and I just did what I thought was best at the time. And yes, my blog readers are quite articulate :) And AWESOME.
ReplyDelete